by Maryann Margolies, Matthew's Mother.

An anniversary marks the annual recurrence of the date of a past event. We commonly associate it with a wedding. It is a cause for celebration.

Matthew Margolies, April 1984 The death of a loved one may also be marked by an anniversary. This serves as a reminder to honor someone. And this is what I would like to do for my son, Matthew Margolies.

Rather than dwell on the heinous crime committed, I would like at this time to focus upon his life. Take a moment to look upon Matthew's death as a celebration of his life. His breath may have been taken away by an unconscionable act however his soul and spirit live on in all those whose lives he has touched.

Matthew knew the value of life and understood the meaning of love. He was caring, considerate, respectful and loving towards others. When his grandfather was ill, it was Matthew who cajoled him to take his medication and nourishment. Matthew was able to make us all smile and find happiness in our darkest moments.

He and his grandfather were inseparable. If grandpa was trimming the hedge or shoveling snow, it was Matthew who was alongside. I wish all children and grandparents could share such a relationship. Those two generations seem to have a special kinship. So, easy going and natural. Matthew Margolies, April 1984

My mother tells me of the time he washed and waxed her kitchen floor as a surprise. He was so proud!

With fishing being his passion, the boys would inventory their supplies after the holidays in preparation for the opening day in April. The girls (grandmother, mother and sister) were called upon to pick night crawlers for bait. They do make better bait than plain old earthworms. Each would have an empty coffee can and a contest would quickly ensue. Who would fill their can first? Laughter would develop as the boys would tell us, "Don't stretch them!" "Quiet, you'll scare them away!" If you have never gone night crawling, you must believe me when I say it requires special technique.

I can still envision him giving a hug to his grandmother, sliding an arm around me and telling me, "Gee, Mom you look nice!" as well as the moments he would tease his sister, engaging her in some Indian wrestling. Matthew Margolies, April 1984

There is a void particularly at holidays and family gatherings. We continue to place his favorite star on top of the Christmas tree for he remains a part of us. Memories cannot be taken away and help ease the pain for those of us left behind.

He has taught us a valuable lesson. Matthew knew how to live life to the fullest, enjoying each day. And most important of all is LOVE. On this his anniversary, please say to a child,

In closing I would like to share with you a poem e-mailed me by someone from England. The author is unknown to me. And it goes like this:

Do not stand at my grave and weep
I am not there I do not sleep
I am a thousand winds that blow
I am the diamond glints on snow
I am the sunlight on ripened grain
I am the gentle autumns rain
When you awaken in the mornings hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circling flight
I am the soft stars that shine at night
Do not stand at my grave and cry
I am not there I did not die

Maryann can be reached by e-mail at:

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